This fortnight's challenge, just in time for the Olympics.
Here's the challenge specs:
The good old Limpstyx Games begin in earnest in my own fair (read: grey, greasy, grim, grotty, grossly underwhelmed) city next weekend. We’re all just stoked about that. Really. Just totally, totally excited.
Anyway. What few people know is that, as part of the opening ceremony, the Olympic Standards Committee, in association with the Big 2 of the comics world, has funded an experimental bioweapons programme with, like, bubbling vats and cloning facilities and big consoles up the wazoo, and ductwork, and chrome stuff, and blinking lights and blah blah blah, to create a glorious figurehead; a guardian; a manifestation of the Olympic Spirit. The mightiest mascot of modern marvellousness.
He/she/it is OLYMPIC FLAME, and boy is he/she/it flamin'.
Quite possibly he’s a big, butch, multi-disciplinary athletic GodBloke who can light the Fiery Cauldron using, I dunno, his Raging Mutant Libido or whatever. Or possibly a cord-muscled steroidgirl with hairy shoulders. Probably he/she/it can shoot terrorists out of the sky, throw javelins at dirty commies, insists on the full bikini-look for the beach volleyball regardless of weather, and looks just Splendid doing a bit of dressage on a pony. Also, LASERBEAMS. And sponsorship. And MISSILES. On ROOFTOPS.
Look, whatever. It’s a fucking Olympic-themed super hero, all right? Leave me alone.
Here’s some FAKTWANK, in case it helps:
“In the time of the original games within the boundaries of Olympia, the altar of the sanctuary dedicated to the goddess Hestia maintained a continuous flame
“Flame from the ancient games was reintroduced during the 1928 Games. An employee of the Electric Utility of Amsterdam lit the first Olympic flame in the Marathon Tower of the Olympic Stadium in Amsterdam.
“The modern convention of moving the Olympic Flame via a relay system from Greece to the Olympic venue began in 1936. Carl Diem devised the idea of the torch relay for the 1936 Summer Olympics in Berlin that was organized by the Nazis under the guidance of Joseph Goebbels.”
Here's my description:
"With his mighty international Rings of Power, the pan-cultural Olympic Flame blazes across the sky, not infringing on any copyrighted properties or licensed symbols, but spreading the spirit of the Olympic Games, no matter where they are held. Consequently, his powers only function for two weeks every four years."
Olympics and the Olympic rings are © The International Olympic Committee